Dr. Patel's Global Support Group

ANNOUNCEMENT

2009-03-03T08:50:00.000-08:00

Notice: All content here, and new additions can be found on a forum of the same name:

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com.
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It has only been about three weeks since the inception of this blog, but I'm already very pleasantly surprised in the level of interest. The support has been wonderful, and for those who have offered it here or through email, I thank you. It has been a fair amount of work, with plenty more to do, but knowing that the contents are seen as having some value, I have been forging ahead...

Being curious, I wanted to see if indeed this material was drawing eyeballs, so I subscribed to a temporary free service to find-out. Attached is a world map showing the location of visitors.

Pretty cool. Global indeed... With 300+ unique visitors, and over 1,000 page views, I was convinced that the information provided was deemed helpful at some level...

However, I have been contacted by a few folks who have experienced issues registering as they wanted to supply comments and participate. This is in essence what I want - interaction, not just me babbling, so I was quite frustrated. Looking at the stats for those visiting further confirmed that there is an inordinate number of folks who spent a lot of time trying to register, with the vast majority giving-up, unfortunately.

If this blog was just about me sharing, all would be fine, but that’s not the case. About two weeks ago I began exploring other options, including modifying certain aspects of the blog to make it more user-friendly. That was a major pain-in-the-butt... I re-visited various free boards or forums, which are fantastic for community-building, but I still found that I didn't like the dependency and lack of control / options they provided, including not the most ideal search functionality...

After much thought, and bouncing ideas off of a few folks on a Google board, it became very clear as to what I needed to do. I researched forum software applications in order to find an offering that I found most appealing, namely one with fantastic search capability, plenty of user options, and one that was highly customizable. After doing my homework and finding what I think to be the best option out there, I downloaded it.

I then needed to find a host or server to put it on, and after asking around, I located one. I then needed to transfer this forum software to this server, so I downloaded an File Transfer Protocol (FTP) client to make this happen. That was a little over a week ago...

Since that time, I've been building-up this board or forum, learning a lot along the way. I actually joined a forum just for those who use this forum software! As of this moment, I have a total of 56 posts there. I received an education on so many things that I wanted to set-up and customize...

After experimenting with it the past couple of days, it seems to be functionally ready to share with you all. Aesthetically, it like 95% there... It has it's share of baby colors that I hope you all will find pleasing: baby blues, a couple shades of pink and a gender neutral hover yellow also. Stuff I just recently learned to do...

If there's one thing you all know about me, it's that I find organization and search to be highly important. You will quickly see that the forum has a structure with this in-mind. And the search is not like many that just takes one to the topic or sub-forum where the word exists, leaving one to scour post after post, even page after page for the info sought. With this forum software, when there's a hit, it provides it directly in the results, highlighted even, in baby girl pink. This should serve us well.

While the blog was intended to be an evolution from the growing and un-scalable email communications, and it certainly was in several respects, it proved to be lacking in the ease of involvement. This forum will improve this aspect dramatically, and also ratchet-up the organization and search capabilities.

Please take a couple minutes to read the contents of "About this Forum". Much is the same as provided here, with some additions... For those who provided comments here, I appreciate you doing so, and I hope you will consider providing your input (copy/paste) on the forum. Ok, enough…

Without further ado, here's the creation: http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com

Below are direct links to the various topics that reside on the forum and are provided here only for better search engine indexing. Use the link above and navigate there as you wish, not the below URL's...

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=28&t=53

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=27&t=25

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=19&t=7

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=19&t=42

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=19&t=41

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=19&t=40

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=19&t=39

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=19&t=35

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=19&t=38

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=19&t=37

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=19&t=36

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewforum.php?f=4

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=24

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=23

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=22

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=21

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=12

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewforum.php?f=10

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=34

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=46

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=52

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=50

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=51

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=16

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=17

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=44

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=43

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=15

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=20

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=19

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=18

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=14

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=13

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewforum.php?f=23

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=23&t=31

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=23&t=45

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=23&t=30

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=23&t=29

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=23&t=28

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=23&t=27

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=23&t=26

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewforum.php?f=24

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=24&t=33

http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com/viewtopic.php?f=24&t=32

Let's talk hotels...

2009-02-19T21:28:00.000-08:00

Notice: All content here, and new additions can be found on a forum of the same name: http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com.
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Ok, while the focus here should be on hotels in Anand, I of course realize that many of us travel through Mumbai, and there can certainly be good reasons to stay in hotels near the local airports in Ahmedabad (AMD) and Vadodara (BDQ). So, please feel free to share where you stayed in these locations also, why that hotel, and your impressions...

In Anand, at least at this time (Feb 2009), the two hotels that seemingly attract the most attention from us visitors are the newer La Casa Inn (http://www.lacasainn.in/) and the venerable Hotel Laksh (http://www.lakshgroup.in/hotellakshresidency/).

La Casa, while I haven't been there, is described as being nicer and cleaner than Hotel Laksh. For those up on the star ratings, it's probably a three, so I understand. Apparently the restaurant there is quite good and offers a very nice variety of cuisine.

Each of these hotels seem to be equidistant from Dr. Patel's clinic (7 minute tuk tuk ride, see video in photo / video post). Hotel Laksh is more near the Big Bazaar, US Pizza (15 minute walk), and Subway (5+ minute tuk tuk ride). La Casa is a little more remote, but more near my favorite restaurant, Hungry Jungle (couple minute tuk tuk ride).

When we were trying to decide between these two back in September 2008, while both are quite affordable, Hotel Laksh was cheaper. And while I can't speak for La Casa, Hotel Laksh provided a 10% discount to Dr. Patel's clients. I wasn't aware of that deal beforehand, so that was a pleasant surprise. For us though, price really wasn't the primary consideration...

My employer, being very supportive, allowed me to work while abroad, but this mandated that I have a decent and reliable internet connection. At that time, La Casa was just getting connected to the web. And while they said they had internet access, it was only in their business center, not in their rooms, and it would be an additional hourly charge. Given the amount to time I would need on the internet, and at odd ours (California time), this wasn't going to hack it. Plus, my wife, who had the final decision because her comfort was the most important factor, also valued the internet a lot because she wanted to instant message and use the webcam to communicate with her family. So, Hotel Laksh it was...

That said, there are other internet options that Uday and/or Hitesh can arrange that leverage the cell network via a laptop card or modem (Tata Indocom, Reliance or BSNL). Likewise, these two will entail costs though and from my experience and others, the bandwidth is just ok.

Hotel Laksh has two wireless networks that span several floors. I still remember the network key: apple. The bandwidth was more than adequate and actually allowed me to watch TV video feeds of my college football and basketball games (Go Bears!). My wife was able to easily instant message and use her webcam and I was able to use my employer's IP phone to participate in a team meeting and call my parents. In this day and age, the internet is becoming more and more essential. So, Hotel Laksh served us very well in this respect. It was down a few times, and those were mostly when the hotel was minus power though...

As of this moment, from a friend who is there now, La Casa is still having some issues with their internet. I'm quite certain they'll get his ironed-out soon though.

Hotel Laksh provides a free in-room breakfast of toast and butter, which we took advantage of daily. With some peanut butter that we brought with us, it was actually a pretty good way to start the day. My wife made coffee in the room as well. In the photos post, one can see some shots of our room and our cooking gear.

We found the overall service at Hotel Laksh to be more than adequate. They were all very friendly and responsive. We didn't use room service every day, but a few times a week, which is typical for us; and they were cool with that. The security guard at the entrance to the hotel was great. He flagged-down a tuk tuk every morning for our trip to Dr. Patel's clinic. We gave him a nice tip at the end of our stay. I'll have a money post discussion soon...

Oh, Hotel Laksh has cable TV, including the basic cable networks, and also HBO. Between a good internet connection and these channels, we were not overly bored. Anand is not exactly a haven for things to do, so that was nice. The room also has a fridge, although we didn't use it much. We did use the A/C, even though it was winter, lol!

When we were preparing to leave Anand, the hotel secured a taxi for us, and upon request, put it on our hotel bill so I could pay everything in one shot, with a credit card. I was also getting low on Rupees and didn't want to hassle with another money exchange...

Besides these hotels, there is also the Hotel Surabhi Regency:http://www.hotelsurabhiregency.com/index.html. If interested, I have a street view photo of this hotel in the photo post. Below this hotel is the only place in Anand to purchase alcohol in this dry state. If you are into wine, Grover Vineyards (not exactly Indian sounding is it?) is pretty good, so I hear.

I just remembered that Hitesh, Dr. Patel's husband, provided us with a pretty helpful area map of Anand. I was able to find it, and scan it in for all to see, download and print:

For future reference, this map (and post) can also be located via the Helpful Links below, and I'll also include it in my photos/video post. Ok, enough of my babbling... Most are staying at La Casa, and I'm sure they can share quite a bit as to why.

What was your route to Anand, India?

2009-02-13T16:31:00.000-08:00

Notice: All content here, and new additions can be found on a forum of the same name: http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com.
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For those of us in the US, it seems depending upon where one lives, travel to India can be quite different. Being in California, we trekked westward, over the Pacific Ocean and through Asia. From the accounts of those who live in the eastern US, they travel eastward over the Atlantic Ocean, through Europe and/or the Middle East. I'll share some particulars of our journey...

After speaking to an Indian colleague who is actually from Ahmadabad (AMD), and who travels there yearly with his family, he convinced me to go with Singapore Airlines. Given the duration of travel (30+ hours from the US), he really likes that Singapore Airlines stops in Singapore for about 7 hours. This length of a stop would be bad, but there's a hotel inside the terminal which he said is a godsend. It gives travelers a chance to shower and get some legitimate sleep before the last leg into India. Upon arrival into AMD airport, those going this route are well-rested and feeling good, or at least better than otherwise. He recommended this route as he feels it's better to avoid Mumbai (Bombay) when possible, especially when AMD is the destination or very near to it. For those who don't know, AMD is about a 1 hour drive to Anand...

Here's the link for this Singapore Airport hotel, terminal 2, which is what you'll want for convenience purposes:

http://athmg.com/location_T2.htm

For the past few years, and for when we traveled in late 2008, terminal 2 was where the departing flight leaves from to AMD. You might want to double-check though. We got some nice sleep and were totally re-invigorated with sleep and a shower. I especially wanted my wife to be as rested and comfortable as possible for what we were about to embark upon...

Singapore Airlines was also quite good in terms of service, food, and handling my inquiries while in Anand when I was trying to get an earlier flight out for us, which we were able to do. We, like many couples, planned to be in Anand a bit longer than probably ultimately necessary. Part of the reason for this is not actually knowing when the procedure will begin as it's pretty much dictated by when the menstrual cycle begins; and as I've come to learn, this can fluctuate by several days, especially when stress is present (and this certainly qualifies). So, I'd recommend building some cushion into your itinerary, and try to make sure there is no penalty by the airlines for changing the departure date. Just so folks know, once Dr. Patel has your current cycle (she asks via email), she will provide a schedule, and with that, a date to arrive in Anand, and a date for departure. From our experience, and that of others, the requested stay is a little over 2 weeks. We booked our travel for three weeks, so as not to have any added stress in case we needed to start earlier or later than expected.

Oh, here's the website for Singapore Airlines:

http://www.singaporeair.com/

And while on the topic, Singapore Airlines, unless in first class, I think like most airlines now, allows for two check-in pieces of luggage per traveler, at a max of 23 KG or a little over 50 lbs each. If like us, you'll be packed to the limit, so check beforehand to avoid issues at the airport. We used our scale at home a lot, and it was well worth it. I will have separate post for a discussion on what exactly to consider bringing...

So, our route went like this: SFO -> Hong Kong to refuel (quick stop) -> Singapore (airport hotel, shower/sleep) -> AMD

So once in AMD airport, then what?

I didn't mention earlier, but we flew the day after the Mumbai terrorist attacks. Suffice it to say, my wife, family and colleagues (yes, they knew) were quite worried. I suppose I was as well, but unless the US government was going to intervene and prevent such travel, I was on a mission; and this was not going stop me/us.

When we left Anand, I had the hotel arrange for a taxi, and upon request, they put it on the hotel bill, which I paid with a credit card (better record-keeping, was low on Rupees & credit card perks). The hotel said for me not to pay a tip as that was already incorporated into the payment for the driver (1,830 Rupees, or about $36 USD at the time).

So, that's the scoop on our travel to AMD, and transportation to/from the airport. I hope this info will be helpful to others. Oh, another thing nice about working with Dr. Patel is that she provides all of the meds, and are included in her pricing. There is not a need to purchase meds separately and carry them abroad, and deal with airport security.

That said, my wife needed to bring meds for her lupus. We got a letter from her doctor that we had ready, but never needed. So for those who also must bring meds, for whatever reason, get a doctor's letter. It is my firm belief that this trip will be the most important in our lifetime; so take all precautions to make sure it goes smoothly as possible.

Ok, I'm sure I missed some things and I know others took different routes to Anand! Hoping others will chime-in with these paths and their experiences...

My wife just reminded me of something that can help others. If you change your plans to leave sooner, print-out your updated itinerary and bring it to the airport. The hotel lobby should allow for this option. We were held-up about 5-10 minutes at the AMD airport as our itinerary and tickets were for a few days later. Safe, ha travels to all.

Being healthy in India - vaccinations, diet & hygiene

2009-02-12T23:27:00.000-08:00

Notice: All content here, and new additions can be found on a forum of the same name: http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com.
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This is a topic that should concern us all. No one wants to get sick or certainly contract some serious disease on this most important trip. After speaking with other couples and doing some research, there is indeed much that one can do when in India, but prior to arrival, receiving vaccinations is often discussed and there is invariably uncertainty on how best to proceed.

Our primary physicians in the States said that we should check with the 'travel doctor' at our hospital for the recommended vaccines for when visiting India. This simply entailed a phone call where I found-out the following should be performed (read, not required): Malaria (pill), Hepatitis A/B, Typhoid, Diphtheria, Tetanus and Polio. And if we didn't have the flu shot already, to get one of those also. Some of these were to be combo shots, but still, that's a lot...

I scheduled an appointment a few days later so we both could receive these shots. I could have made an appointment sooner, but I wanted some time so I could research how these vaccines might negatively impact our success with IVF. Between what my Indian colleague told me, and what the US Embassy in India shared a year or so ago with someone else, Malaria is no longer a serious issue in India. Plus, I've heard of more than a couple instances of folks getting quite ill from taking these Malaria pills.

After chatting with folks who did and did not get vaccinations, and hearing their logic for their decisions, I called to cancel our appointment. My wife still went for her annual flu shot though. The uncertainty as to how these might affect us was bothersome at some level. Also, after researching these diseases, and learning how they are contracted, I felt that with proper hygiene and precaution, we can avoid or very much limit our exposure.

Mosquitoes are quite prevalent in India. As I said earlier, Malaria is very much under control now though. The pills have made some people quite sick. The cost/benefit analysis had us avoid these. We did bring a DEET-based mosquito repellent, but didn’t really need it in December. I’ve also heard that lemon Eucalyptus works well. And from someone in Anand now, apparently there is a repellent cream called “ODOMOS” that works quite well on Indian mosquitoes. It only costs about 50 Rupees and can be had in the local pharmacies, like from those near the Big Bazaar. Also, from a friend, I just learned of Doxycyline which apparently can act as barrier to Malaria. So, for those who want to take something prior to arrival, this would seem to be a worthwhile option to explore. Hopefully folks will begin to chime-in here so we can get more details…

Hepatitis A/B can be acquired via a number of ways, with viral being the most common. This entails a transfer via shared bodily fluids, such as blood, semen, vaginal secretions, breast milk, saliva and tears. For those who don't know, Dr. Patel's clinic uses new, sealed needles for blood draws and injections. Coupled with good hygiene and common sense, including being faithful to your spouse, it would seem that Hep A/B can be avoided.

Typhoid is contracted from bacteria usually found in foods and water. Eat only foods and sauces that have been cooked. At a wedding in India, my wife dipped a chip in a cold sauce, and once she realized what she had done, it was too late. She didn't get Typhoid, but some bacteria that made her quite ill (vomiting and diarrhea) for two days. She had to get an IV at Dr. Patel's clinic, actually twice as I believe the other time was due to her brushing her teeth with tap water. I recommend keeping bottled water in the bathroom for brushing the teeth and washing-out the mouth.

Diphtheria is a contagious disease, and is quite prevalent in India. That said, in 2005 there were just 8,229 reported cases in the world; however 71% (5,826) of those were in India. To put things in perspective, the population in India in 2005 was well over 1 billion, making those infected with Diphtheria .0005% of the population. A numbers game I suppose, but we decided to not get this vaccine.

Tetanus is caused from an infection, usually due to a cut, or wound. We passed on this one also. My thinking was to just be careful so as to avoid falling down or getting injured somehow. Easier said than done I suppose, but we managed.

Polio is spread from person to person, usually from fecal material to the mouth. When you shake some one's hand, visit a restroom and touch objects inside, always wash hands well afterwards. When leaving a bathroom for example, after washing my hands, I always take the paper I dried my hands with and use it to open the door, discarding it at the next available trash can, hopefully right by the door. Heck, I do this in the office here in the States also, as do some of my colleagues. Just good practice really. Also, while it's helpful to be cautious of what you come in contact with, you can further protect yourself by limiting how often you touch your eyes, nose and mouth with your hands.

So, this was my/our logic for not get any vaccinations. Right or wrong, we didn't get any. Also, ask Dr. Patel for her thoughts. When we did around September 2008, and in her opinion, we didn't need to. If she would have said otherwise, this would have made a difference in our thinking. I encourage you to inquire also just in case circumstances might have changed.

With respect to bottled water, popular consensus was that AquaFina and Bisleri were the best. The hotels have them, but the prices are higher, but still pretty cheap though. If I can find the photo, I’ll share where we got 2 liter bottles very near the clinic, and for just 25 Rs (about 50 cents). I brought many Mountain House meals (http://www.rei.com/search?query=mountain+house) that we made in our room. I figured that if my wife wasn’t feeling well, leaving to eat wouldn’t be desirable. Plus, they really taste good! If and when you do go out to eat, you might want to wash your silverware. The couples we dined with did this as a precaution. Again, only eat hot foods and sauces. If you want fruit like my wife, it is recommended to only eat those that are peel-able. Dr. Patel's driver brought us to a fruit stand right near the clinic. When leaving her clinic, make a right turn. At that major road, across the street, slightly to the left are some fruit vendors. He has a nice selection and charged us the local (fair) price. The phonetic spelling of his name is "Iles" and he is seen here (sitting down):

For an idea as to what fruit costs, my wife got a whole pineapple (cut there on the spot and bagged), 6 - 8 oranges, and 1 pomegranate, and I think something else for 150 Rs, or about $3 USD.

I hope this helps and it would be great if others can add to this knowledge base…

Getting an Indian Visa

2009-02-12T00:49:00.000-08:00

Notice: All content here, and new additions can be found on a forum of the same name: http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com.
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While I realize that Dr. Patel is internationally famous, my experience in getting an Indian Visa is from the US. I hope our friends from Canada, Australia, UK, Iceland and other countries can share what they did to get the needed visa...

I would guess that there is more than one way to obtain an Indian visa in the US. We used this website: https://www.indian-visa.com/homepage

We found it to be rather straight-forward and easy. Being optimistic, we requested a 1-year visa with the hope that we'd return to pick-up a baby within 12 months (as of this moment, we are 11 weeks pregnant!). As you can see, the price is really not that much more expensive for a 1-year visa. In the Fall of 2008, this cost us $98 each, and with $20 for shipping, it was $216 total. We got the needed photos right at Costco for $11 for both of us and mailed those, along with our passports and application. Follow the directions carefully.

The turn-around time was a little over a week. Given that, I wouldn't apply too early as the visa time starts ticking once approved, not upon entering India.

Anyone go about securing their visa differently, or have other helpful information to share?

Also, the application asks for the reason(s) for visiting India. I seem to recall mixed opinions on how to respond. One option is for medical treatment, or something to that effect; and many of us didn't feel comfortable stating that as the reason for travel. I went back-and-forth on this question, and ultimately decided to just put travel / tourism. I feel that if one states they are visiting only Anand, it might be deduced that a visit to Dr. Patel's clinic is the reason; so I'd be a bit careful with this response. I stated that we were planning to visit Ahmedabad, Anand, and I believe Surat, so as to take the focus off Anand.

I think it might be helpful for all to hear how others addressed this question, and more importantly the thinking behind the decision...

IVF Preparations

2009-02-12T00:47:00.000-08:00

Notice: All content here, and new additions can be found on a forum of the same name: http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com.
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Even though we were going to use a surrogate to carry for us, my wife and I proceeded with the typical recommendations for couples who wish to become pregnant themselves. Our thinking was to simply do all that we can to possibly help our chances. In the case of surrogacy, as I’ve learned, it is us guys where most of difference can be made. A woman’s eggs are pretty well-protected from harsh elements and meds. That said, I did learn of one med that my wife almost took which is quite toxic and can lead to sterility.

We both did not have any alcohol for several months prior to our trip to Anand, India. And this was during football season! A sacrifice that was not all that difficult though. I don’t drink coffee or sodas, but we both stopped our intake of caffeine, namely by going with decaf tea (green, a very good antioxidant also). We never were smokers, but if you are, it is important to understand that this habit can hurt your (male & female) chances for success.

We take a good multi-vitamin, and my wife takes as part of her lupus treatment plan, folic acid, calcium and iron - which are highly recommended during pregnancy as seen in prenatal vitamin ingredients. Also recommended are fatty acids, such as Omega-3’s (make sure it is DHA and/or EPA). I had already been taking those, so it was easy to get my wife started as well.

Another side benefit of the Omega-3 supplement is that it helps thin the blood a little. Birth control pills (BCP’s) and the stimulation meds (estrogen in general) to be administered in India have a way of thickening the blood. If this is a concern, also consider a baby aspirin, which my wife was already taking as well. Please understand that my degrees are in the legal field and I’m not a nutritionist. I did do a fair amount of research though and ran this stuff by my wife’s doctor; and he concurred. Also, stress is not good for the IVF process, as with many things in life. If it can be avoided or alleviated, all the better. Easier said than done…

Ok, for us guys, the first thing to keep-in-mind is that the sperm that will hopefully make you a father was created from 65 to 74 days ago. This is not something you can do at the last second. Besides the aforementioned (alcohol and caffeine), drink PLENTY of water, and yes, loose-fitting underwear and pants do make a difference. It’s all about heat. So, do your best to avoid hot tubs and the like also. As far supplements go, after much research, I took a separate zinc, selenium, vitamin C & E pill daily. One can buy an all-in-one male fertility pill, but those were much more expensive. As a note, all of these ingredients are included in most multi-vitamins, but nothing near the recommended dosage needed to make a difference.

Another thing I just remembered is trying to avoid exposure to toxins and harsh chemicals. Think gasoline, solvents, even some of the more hardcore bathroom cleaning agents. These have shown to impact sperm...

My wife had never used BCP’s before, but Dr. Patel recommends, or at least generally recommends starting these on day 5 of the period just before traveling to India. This helps her with improved control of the timing of when the all important next cycle begins in India. In my wife’s case, because her periods were fluctuating like crazy (26 to 34 days), Dr. Patel recommended starting BCP’s a month earlier to better stabilize the periods. I mention this here so as to allow others sufficient time to contact your doctor and have the prescription ready.

In terms of getting our body’s ready for this trip, I realize that I might have missed a few things, so I hope others will provide additional input.

Have photos & video of Anand?

2009-02-12T00:44:00.000-08:00

Notice: All content here, and new additions can be found on a forum of the same name: http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com.
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Ok, this is the place to provide all, well almost all, of the relevant photos and videos you took while visiting Anand, India. They say a picture is worth a 1,000 words, so it is my hope that these will be helpful...

Provide links or url's to where the photos and videos are maintained. And if I'm not asking too much, please give us a brief caption for each explaining what we are looking at. The main purpose here is to help others who have not yet visited Anand to have a very good idea of what to expect. I envision photos and video of the clinic, staff, roads / traffic, animals, hotels, restaurants, etc...

One more note, and while I probably don't need to say this, please be respectful of others and their wishes. I remember when we were in Anand, many of us couples didn't want our photos taken that might show-up on the internet or in some publication (reporters were out there at the time). We have quite a few photos of other couples, and ourselves, that we need to sift through first before sharing here. Also, I'd recommend not including photos of any surrogates.

Thanks for taking the time to do this. Ok, with my wife's help, here are about 70 photos that we'd like to share:

http://picasaweb.google.com/gobears89/AnandIndiaPhotosDec2008?feat=directlink

I tried to include some helpful info in the captions as well. Click to enlarge and read...

As a first time user of Picasa, I'm very impressed. It was very easy to use.

And here I just added a YouTube video of one our first tuk tuk rides from Hotel Laksh to Dr. Patel's clinic:

I look forward to seeing what others have to share... Thanks.

Why surrogacy and why Dr. Patel in India?

2009-02-12T00:42:00.000-08:00

Notice: All content here, and new additions can be found on a forum of the same name: http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com.
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I have come to learn that most folks who are pondering surrogacy have been through at least several IVF cycles and have come to feel that surrogacy is the next logical step in the quest of parenthood. We never attempted IVF before as that would not help us because my wife is taking certain medications that are known to cause birth defects. Basically, we were advised to not pursue pregnancy. As far as we know, we are not infertile, but might as well be...

We thought of adoption, and still do I suppose, but with waitlists years out, this is not exactly an appealing option. Surrogacy, while expensive in the US, was extensively researched though. What ultimately drove us to Dr. Patel's clinic in Anand, India was not just the price though. In the US one must separately find a clinic, a surrogate and a lawyer. It became apparent rather quickly that this was a lot to juggle. A great clinic is very important, but so is a wonderful surrogate. They are not always in the same area and sometimes the surrogate will be adamant on using a certain clinic. There might also be an insistence on using her lawyer and contract; one that might not be exactly intended parent (IP) friendly. Also, there are clinics that won't proceed with certain surrogates, usually because of their size or BMI. It was very frustrating. One could get an agency to handle everything, but then the price really skyrockets toward $100k. With the economic downturn in 2008, money became much more of a factor as well for us. I'm guessing for others also...

My mom had sent to me an email in the Spring of 2008 about Dr. Patel and the Oprah show that had aired in the Fall of 2007. I emailed Dr. Patel shortly thereafter and secured a date about 6 months later...

We ultimately chose Dr. Patel because of the simplicity of having everything arranged or provided by her clinic, including the meds (no need source those elsewhere and hassle with airport security). What a relief. Also a factor of course is her wonderful success rates! And, given that an "attempt" (in late 2008) would just cost us about $10,000 USD (5,600 to her clinic, plus airfare, hotel, etc), it was the clear, logical choice, at least for us.

Oh, another factor is the positive impact the money has on the surrogate and her family. As with the life brought into the world, the money she receives with a successful pregnancy is life-altering. As I recall, she will get about $7,000 USD. When we were out there, we learned that a home can be purchased for about $2,500 USD. Money is often used by surrogates to put their children through college. I find it somewhat rewarding to know that both our lives, and that of our respective families, will be better off by virtue of this chance relationship.

Curious to hear what factors or considerations drove others to Anand...

4: Back Home with Baby/ies Discussion

2009-02-12T00:36:00.000-08:00

Notice: All content here, and new additions can be found on a forum of the same name: http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com.
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This post is #4 in a series of 4 free-form discussions related to where a couple is in the process. Unlike the topic-centric posts that adhere strictly to the subject, these are much more open to multiple subjects and are deticated to those who are at this particular stage. Here are the four stages of these free-form discussions:

1: In India Discussion - Baby-making!
2: Awaiting Pregnancy & Birth Discussion
3: In India Discussion - Baby Pick-up!
4: Back Home with Baby/ies Discussion

By making it this far, a dream has obviously been realized and as you must know, your accomplishments serve as hope and encouragement for us all. That said, I've come to learn that there is still often much in the way of support that we all can provide and learn from each other. Some possible discussions that might surface here could be about meeting the family & friends, health concerns, doctor visits, immunizations, care, clothes, and parenting tips & tricks...

As expressed in the three previous stages, even if you are not at this stage now, but have relevant input on the discussion, please chime-in as well.

This might serve as a good place to just keep-in-touch also.

3: In India Discussion - Baby Pick-up!

2009-02-12T00:33:00.000-08:00

Notice: All content here, and new additions can be found on a forum of the same name: http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com.
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This post is #3 in a series of 4 free-form discussions related to where a couple is the process. Unlike the topic-centric posts that adhere strictly to the subject, these are much more open to multiple subjects for those who are at this particular stage. Here are the four stages of these free-form discussions:

1: In India Discussion - Baby-making!
2: Awaiting Pregnancy & Birth Discussion
3: In India Discussion - Baby Pick-up!
4: Back Home with Baby/ies Discussion

If you are currently in India to pick-up your baby or babies, and want to share experiences, or have pressing questions or concerns, you've found the right place. And if you are not at this stage now, but were, or have relevant input on the discussion, please chime-in as well.

While other posts in this blog are focused on specific topics (helps a lot with organization), this one, and the three like it, are geared to where you are in the process. For example, questions about restaurants, health matters, money are (or will be soon) separate topics here, they are all fair game in this "In India" thread also! And of course conversations about birth, immunizations, care, feeding options, and course getting back home are most important, and just a sampling of what can or should be discussed here.

I'll make this very simple, if you are in India to get your baby/ies, even if there are topics that address a particular comment/question you have, post here in you like. That said, if you have new, helpful info that we all are not yet aware, like a new restaurant you found for example, I ask that you later go to the appropriate post (restaurants in this case), and add a comment there, updating it this current find.

Congratulations on realizing your dream of parenthood!

2 - Awaiting Pregnancy & Birth Discussion

2009-02-12T00:26:00.000-08:00

Notice: All content here, and new additions can be found on a forum of the same name: http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com.
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This post is #2 in a series of 4 free-form discussions related to where a couple is in the process. Unlike the topic-centric posts that adhere strictly to the subject, these are much more open to multiple subjects for those who are at this particular stage. Here are the four stages of these free-form discussions:

1: In India Discussion - Baby-making!
2: Awaiting Pregnancy & Birth Discussion
3: In India Discussion - Baby Pick-up!
4: Back Home with Baby/ies Discussion

This is for those of us who are back home after completing the IVF / surrogacy process with Dr. Patel. If you just returned to your home and comfy bed after what was probably a very unique and exciting experience, you are now awaiting news if this trek to Anand, India has materialized into a pregnancy. This is often referred to as the dreaded two week wait (2ww). We got good news on the 2009 New Year, and are now (14 Feb 2009) a little over 11 weeks pregnant.

So, this discussion is for those folks who await confirmation of a pregnancy, and if that is achieved, it then offers support for those who await the birth of their child/children. And if you are not at this stage now, but were, or have relevant input on the discussion, please chime-in as well.

Topics are bound to be many over the course of about 9 months! Some that come-to-mind: understanding beta numbers, ultrasound scans, surrogate care, baby care after birth, getting a room ready, thoughts on how to tell family and friends, what to bring to India for the baby/ies (like silver nitrate, Erthromycin & Tetracycline) and securing a pediatrician at home. Again, these are just a few...

While the majority of posts in this blog are focused on specific topics (helps a lot with organization), this one, and the three others like it, are geared to where you are in the process.

1: In India Discussion - Baby-making!

2009-02-12T00:16:00.000-08:00

Notice: All content here, and new additions can be found on a forum of the same name: http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com.
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This post is #1 in a series of 4 free-form discussions related to where a couple is the process. Unlike the topic-centric posts that adhere strictly to the subject, these are much more open to multiple subjects for those who are at this particular stage. Here are the four stages of these free-form discussions:

1: In India Discussion - Baby-making!
2: Awaiting Pregnancy & Birth Discussion
3: In India Discussion - Baby Pick-up!
4: Back Home with Baby/ies Discussion

If you are currently in India to start the IVF / surogacy process, and want to share experiences, or have pressing questions or concerns, you've found the right place. And if you are not at this stage now, but were, or have relevant input on the discussion, please chime-in as well.

While other posts in this blog are focused on specific topics (helps a lot with organization), this one, and the three others like it, are geared to where you are in the process. For example, questions about restaurants, health matters, money are (or will be soon) separate topics here, they are all fair game in this "In India" thread also! And of course conversations about the IVF process and surrogacy are most germane as you are now living it, not just educating yourself... Discussing your cycle, meeting your surrogate, the meds/injections, eggs, the collections room (us guys), embryos, the transfer, gifting your surrogate, etc are all most appropriate here.

I'll make this very simple, if you are in India, and even if there is a specific post on a topic that you have a particular comment/question, posting here is perfectly fine. That said, if you have new, helpful info that we all are not yet aware, like a new restaurant you found for example, I ask that you later go to the appropriate topic post (restaurants in this example), and add a comment there regarding this newly found restaurant as well so that topic stays as informative as possible.

Blog's Purpose, Structure & How to Use

2009-02-12T00:06:00.000-08:00

Notice: All content here, and new additions can be found on a forum of the same name: http://dr-patel-surrogacy.com.
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First, I'd like to say that there are many wonderful websites and forums on the web about pregnancy, IVF, surrogacy, and even ones that cover surrogacy in other countries, like India. This blog though is quite specific in that it focuses strictly on surrogacy at Dr. Patel's Akanksha Clinic in Anand, India. If you have an interest in doing IVF and/or surrogacy with Dr. Patel, or are currently engaged with her and the wonderful staff at her clinic, then you might find this blog quite helpful. With the scope of this blog understood, I'd now like to share the motivation behind its inception.

If my mom had not made me aware of Dr. Patel (Oprah show) through an email in the Spring of 2008, we would not be pregnant today. And worse yet, we would not have hope; and that’s truly tragic. Similarly, when we were cycling in Anand with Dr. Patel, we met a couple from San Diego, California (USA) who had just witnessed the birth of their son. The father had explained to me that he learned of Dr. Patel while putting some newspapers in the recycle bin and noticed an article on surrogacy, referencing her name. He said it was a magical moment. Shortly thereafter, he contacted Dr. Patel through email, and about year later, the couple found themselves in India, holding their baby.

Call it a miracle or a whim, this is a wonderful story, but one is left to ponder how many folks were not so fortunate to stumble across such information, or have a proactive family member or friend share the possibility with them. Knowledge is indeed power; and the intent of this blog is to empower us all, not just a few, with this life-altering information.

Having been a part of so many conversations over email, phone and in-person, there is a wealth of knowledge that we all possess. I want this blog to serve as repository to help us and those who follow. Understanding the structure of the blog is important in order to get the most out of it.

Data will be captured through one of two approaches: topic-centric posts and stage-centric ones (where one is in the IVF / surrogacy process). There is bound to be some overlap in content provided, and that is fine.

Here are these more dynamic stage-centric posts that are not bound by a specific topic, but are focused on where one is in the process:

1: In India Discussion - Baby-making!
2 Awaiting Pregnancy & Birth Discussion
3: In India Discussion - Baby Pick-up!
4: Back Home with Baby/ies Discussion

If you are in any of the above stages, you should feel free to contribute with commentary and questions there. And of course, even if you are not in a particular stage, yet have relevant commentary to the discussion, this is for you as well. To the left, I've created the Blog Post List to display these at the top, in sequence (1-4), just under this intro post. The posts that follow will be on specific topics. The Blog Post List is for quick and easy navigation.

There will ultimately be quite a few topic-centric posts, but as of now (16 Feb 2009), here is what I’ve generated thus far:

Getting an Indian Visa
Why surrogacy and why Dr. Patel in India?
IVF Preparations
What was your route to Anand, India?
Being healthy in India - vaccinations, diet & hygiene
Have photos & video of Anand?

These topic-centric posts are to strictly adhere to the subject. Such organization should make it easy to locate relevant material. That said, there will be times when doing a search will be beneficial.

With respect to searching the contents of the blog, the “SEARCH BLOG” box atop the page will query the blog, but apparently only the posts, not the comments. I wasn't keen on that limitation. I found a way using something called Yahoo! Pipes to query the entirety of this blog - the original posts, and the comments that follow. If you wish to run such a comprehensive query, please go to the “Helpful Links” section at the bottom of this blog and click on the first link to run a search. Speaking of those links, please check them periodically for updates. And if you didn't already notice, there are some helpful widgets just above the links that reveal such things as the local time in Anand (India has just one time zone though), the weather and a handy currency converter. If you envision other ones that would be desirable, please comment here.

Lastly, for those who wish to participate in these discussions, it seems that there might be some confusion with respect to anonymity. For a multitude of reasons, many of us wish not to have our identity known. I'd like to make it abundantly clear that when communicating here, one is doing so through a self-created profile. There is no need to provide one's real name, true location, and if one so chooses, an email address need not be revealed either. More personally identifiable information is conveyed through the typical email exchange than what will be available here.

So, that said, join-up, gather your thoughts, and contribute to the knowledge base! Your participation is encouraged, and really needed for this venture to thrive. Thank you. Tony